Helllp:'(about ed disorder?

i suffer from anorexia and ednos Ive been chewing and spitting since trying to recover after hospital back in june last year my weight droped in time from then i had a relapse im now 55 pounds.i chew spit alot feal hell guilty about it i understand u do it right that u dont get any calories from it.its like a addictsion u do it one min 5 mins later ur seeing ur self do it more.i dounno why im very protetive of my food ill put some in my room or in the frezzer hide it in bags so no one touch it i dounno why today i feel real guilty i chewed and spitted a waffle and crumpet with syurp 4 cookiesbread stick 4 carmel bunnies fudge choclaates chewits a kit cat pringles fruit nut bar crips and bit of a easter egg urgh i feel so crap i just cant stop i keep going bk n bk n bk no zoe i wont do it then i do..any views